Hot dudes - Makhuk langka

Heya fellas,

Or shall I say girls. Kenapa fontnya warnanya merah? Karena I wanna show you some hot dudes. Gw melihat ke kanan dan ke kiri. Atas dan bawa. Engga perna ada gitu yang gw liat cowo-cowo di sekitar gw yang macamnya seperti ini:




















Or seperti ini:



















Mengapa cowo yang hot bangeth bangeth seperti ini jarang banget ya? Yang badannya ok. Yang mukanya bikin meleleh. Sering gw liat cewe cakep. Manies, etc. Tapi jarang liat cowo yang bikin gw lumer. I WANT ONE!! *scream like bf doesnt exist*. What do you think girls? Apa mungkin gw kurang keluar or bergaul, jadinya jarang liat cowo hottie? Apakah di sekitar elo banyak cowo cakep berceceran? Please let me know where you hang around, and I shall come and pick up those dudes. hohohoho.
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Body part

Heya fellas,

In my life I have 3 very very good male friends. Yang kocak, geblek, ga mo kala, overly protective and I love to bits. One of them is my bf. And the other 2, kayaknya uda ga anggep gw cewe. Dan mereka tu suka ngoce-ngoce hal-hal yang engga penting banget, even though I am around. One day this question come up (from the dodgiest of all, you know who you are!:P): "So, are you leg, boobs or bum guy?"

What are we? Consist only of body part? Other things doesn't count? *shallow dudes: part 2* Btw, I've heard this question TWICE loh, by different group of male friends.

Engga perna denger gw, cewe nanya each other: "Kalo lo ngeliat cowo, dari apanya? Leg, boobs, or bum?" That's just sound so wrong. Gw perna denger someone that comment soal cowo body part, which is betis nya lelaki. Only once.

Dan dia lelaki juga.

He's gay.

Yang jadi cewenya.

FYI. Menurut dia.. cowo yang betisnya gede, is very attractive. Secara itu indicate yang punya betis gede itu kuat standing up for a very long time. If you know what I mean. Huahuahuhauhaua (*evil laugh*, since I can imagine cowo-cowo yang straight mukanya begimana). Thus, I conclude this question of body part cuma applicable buat cowo. Engga yang straight, engga yang mencong bencong, semuanya sama oey!
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Favourite thing.

Heya fellas,

Gw punya questions for the dudes. Do you have some item - in form of textile/clothes, yang di keep padahal tampang tu barang sangatlah gembel?? Atau punya kaos berbiji-biji, terutama yang dari concert apa band yang lo demen banget pas smp/sma, lagi jaman-jaman rock atau gothic-gothic an, tapi uda engga pantes lagi dipake sekarang (since you've grown up already, age wise at least)?? Uda engga pantes, engga dipake lagi, tapi engga mau dibuang atau kasi ke siapa kek yang bakalan pake. Karena memories attached to it?

Gw find that dudes tend to keep some garment karena they think, kalo kaos "ih, yang warna nya uda memudar gini uda comfy trus sekarang lagi trend kan? retro-retro gitu." Alasan. I know the real reason is because you find it very comfy regardless how it looks like. Iya kalo emang artisticly memudar, kalo memudar gara-gara dicuci entah berapa ribu kali?? ada bolong di bagian tertentu? I've got a story to dish out about this. (mentang-mentang cowo gw engga ngerti iniii.. hohohohoho)

My bun pake boxer. And there's this particular boxer. Mungkin dulu warnanya putih. Tapi uda jadi rada-rada abu-abu. Trus uda rada tembus pandang. Lining di bawanya uda kerobek separo, ampe tu lining uda ke dengkul. Karetnya uda give, jadi suka kedodoran. Tiap gw ngeliat dia pake tu boxer bener-bener sakit mata la ya. When I notice this boxer, qta jalan belom begitu lama, jadi gw engga ngomong apa-apa. In a way for him to chuck away that boxer, gw pikir dia kurang boxer, gw beliin dia 1 dozen boxer. EH, gw masi liat dia pake tu stupid ugly amit-amit boxer. After sometime, I think it is time for me to take action.

Bun: Hun, did you see my white cotton boxer?
Me: Yes.
Bun: Where is it?
Me: There, on the bench (gw jadiin topok - of course, after I wash it laaaa)
Bun: WHAT?? *horror* that's the comfiest boxer I have hun!! It's nice to go sleep with.
Me: Well, it's ruined my eyes way too long.

Hehehe.

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Men are Dogs ~ U think u know why?

Heya fellas,

Sering ketika berantem, secara nga sadar cewe suka makiin cowo2 dgn sebutan ‘dasar AnJinG lo!’

Atau ketika digodain cowo2 nga penting di jalan .. ‘dasar keparat, anjing lo’. Dikit2 .. anjing anjing anjing ..

Hehe, pernah terlintas alasannya? Apakah lo pikir cewe hanya sekedar melampiaskan emosi dgn sebutan itu sepertinya kita bisa bales dendam? Cetak rekor 1-1?

FYI, gw suka banget sama doggies … bahkan di facebook gw, deskripsi yg harusnya gw isi dgn kalimat2 narsis nan keren, gw isi dgn my passion with dogs as pets. Call me weird..I don't care.

Setiap hari gw nyempetin waktu untuk maen2 sama doggie gw. Gw hapal banget sifat2 nya. Keburukan dia .. kebaikan dia .. kegatelan dia .. I miss him even when I'm with him. Aneh? Nga donk, dulu gw jg suka pny feeling yg spt itu terhadap mantans. (Aren't us girls sweet???) Tapi baru hari ini gw sadar kalo sifat2 nya doggie gw itu ada di human being too. Here's the examples :

....ibaratnya seekor DOGgie neh, the harder we pull the leash, the stronger he pushes to be free. Semakin dikekang, semakin kuat si cowo akan memberontak. Iya kan? Hayo ngaku..pdhl us girls cuman being protective. Takut lo ilang.

..namun biar bandel-bandel gitu lo tetep suka di patting. Suka dibilangin “Good Dog”. Suka diGaruk2in leher nya .. perutnya.. and my dog will lick me upside down, left to right. Basah dah gw.. *wink*

Man Man … your format of ‘territorial marking’ is nebar benih dimana-mana. Wait I have a word for that .. (duh lupa). You may think it's COOL and and ... JANTAN abis. Tapi sbnrnya lo udah contribute to this overpopulated country tauk. Mending kalo DNA nya bagus, tapi kalo DNA nya bejat? Lo udah ciptain anak2 yg bejat jg.

Back to the point eniwei whenever wherever you(or my dog) see a bitch … you go "ugh baybeh can’t help it, gotta let it .. gotta release it...." Dunia jadi gelap, gak perduli apapun, langsung maen tikam aja..nga ngeh whether itu bitch udah nga available. That's my dog.

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To my fellas girls : Man … indeed resembles a dog. Their loyalty is unpredictable. To some breeds, no matter how good u feed and groom them, if another bitch pass by, she’s gonna get hitched. Kayanya yg ini udah lumrah banget deh, satu male doggie bisa mate dengan berpuluh2 female doggies. Cowo jg begitu bukan? Suka punya selingkuhan ...

So, now u know why u call them dogs?

Based on my theory, men are born with dogs' nature. Hate to admit it ... No matter what, we still can't live without them. :)

nb : I can't believe it took me so long to come up with this theory.
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Angel vs Squirrel

Heya fellas,

Di hari yang kelam di my side of my world (ujan es batu bo), otak gw tiba-tiba muncul tipe lelaki yang bisa membantu meng-identify, dia jatuh di category apa. Over generalisation, cowo itu ada 2 tipe dengan transisi. Satu angel dude (cowo baeeeeeeeeeeeeeee banget), dan squirrel dude (squirrel = bajing**, fill in the blank).

Angel dude
Ini tipe cowo yang gentleman abies tanpa maksud. emang dari sononya bae. bisa disalahkan dengan tebar pesona, padahal engga maksud. Yang kalo ngajakin pegi, mo clubbing kek apa cuma keluar, dikarenakan he thinks you're a potential good friend, not because he wants to get inside your pants. Setia, perhatian, pengertian, tapi suka bolot, engga tau how to treat a girl. Engga begitu ngerti gimana caranya luluhin cewe. Or to be romantic. Gw ada beberapa teman cowo seperti ini, yang sampe gw kasi tau engga bole baeeeee banget ama cewe yang bukan cewe nya sendiri, kalo engga cewe dia beneran bisa cape ati. Ato engga, itu cewe yang dibaein salah kaprah.Yang diputusin ama cewenya karena dia terlalu bae (kasian ga seeee).

Squirrel dude


Selalu bae dengan maksud. Mulutnya manieeesssss banget. Bikin cewe mudah meleleh. But full of bull, aka banyak boongnya. Yang patut di jauhi, tapi bingungnya selalu the ones that get the girls. Gonta-ganti cewe seperti ganti kolor. I reckon because they seems edgy. Ato mungkin chicks like the idea of menakluklan squirrel dudes? Ato emang rencana dari sononya cuma buat maen-maen? What do you think? I know one ultimate squirrel. Dan gw sempet kepikiran untuk go for him. Secara temen-temen cewe gw yang perna coba, bilang dia itu jago banget. On bed. Hm..... Hohoho. Tapi I don't have enough guts to go for it, 1st of all, karena dia pasti membawa banyak kuman dari segala macam negara, 2nd of all, bisa digaruk ama nyak gw ama garukan taman (SO GATAL NGANA EH!!! *nyak gw menado).

Transition period
Angel to Squirrel >> Ini anak bae-bae yang depressi engga dapet cewe, karena as I mentioned above, squirrel dude meraup semua cewe-cewe. Jadi coba terlihat edgy.. dengan merokok, yang udah minta (engga beli, kan baru mulai...), trus cuma diisep trus dibuang, engga dihirup ke dalam. BUANG-BUANG ROKOK ORANG! Yang sok-sok ngajak mari minum, trus minum cuma satu shot/gelas, langsung tepar. Ato ga, yang try to be hot, tapi dandannya menjijikan (kemeja dibuka, bulu dadanya lari ke mana-mana), trus ngomongnya not smooth, tapi sleazy.

Squirrel is a born. Not a made.

Squirrel to Angel >> Yang trully squirrel, never gonna happen. Yang happen, biasanya ketemu cewe yang bener-bener bisa lurusin dia. Masi suka flirt-flirt tanpa alasan yang jelas, just for fun. Masi suka keluar bermain-main (minum, dll) kadang-kadang. Tapi karena udah "ketangkep" jadinya terkontrol.

What you think? :D

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Cleaning Time...

Heya fellas,

Well, this is generally speaking ya.. Mengapa lelaki itu males banget beberes? Ini mungkin lebih applicable buat dudes yang tinggal di luar negeri ya, di mana pembantu itu extinct species yang mahalnya amit amit. It's like:

(Typical scenario)
Girl: Say, beresin donk tu baju
Dude: Bisa beresin ga?
Girl: (Whaaatttt!?!? Gw pacar apa pembantu!! *emosi*) Engga, beresin sendiri napa?
Dude: Kamu tu ya.. Dimintain tolong aza susah banget. Kamu tu sayang ga si sebenarnya sama aku?
Girl: (cari ribut ni orang..) Kayaknya uda sering si aku beresin, kamu sekali kali napa?
Dude: Tapi kamu kan cewe aku...

Good point. Back to original point. Pacar apa pembantu? Pacar rangkap pembantu? Hadouken trus dilempar dari balcony apartment. Mind you, I'm not the super clean and tidy type. Relatively wajar buat cewe deh ya. Atau malah under the normal girl standard sometime (yang pasti keadaan di atas, NOT my own experience:P). Asal ga berantakan, baju, barang dll di tempatnya, engga berdebu-debu banget, I think that should be fine...

As I said before.. engga semuanya memang cowo males beberes. Flatmate gw bersihnya ampun-ampun. Tiap minggu dustingnya pake tissue basahnya Johnson&Johnson bo. Biar hygenic katanya. Maybe he's mistaken the table with baby's bottom... Baju gw yang gw lempar di sofa dilipetin pula. I think, dapet cowo yang kayak gini susah juga. Karena terlalu bersih dan rapi, mau up to his standard juga bisa ngos-ngosan. Kecuali kalo cewenya sama clean craze juga. Compatible deh ya...

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Sorry seems to be the easiest word.

Heya fellas,

Titlenya dari lagu "Sorry..... seems to be the hardest word..." Well, not so for most dudes I think. Well, gw baru baca this article about a guy when they say:

"I'm sorry."
When a guy says this, there's a good chance that he's more confused than contrite. "I've apologized to tons of women, and not once was I perfectly clear on what I'd done wrong, I was, however, totally clear on the fact that I was expected to apologize."

Sometimes, something that so obviously menyebalkan buat cewe-cewe, para lelaki has no idea, why it makes us so upset. Lemot? Another insensitive aspect of man? Selama gw berantem ama sang bun (bf), dia engga perna bilang "I'm sorry for what I did", dia bilangnya "I'm sorry for making you feel that way." Berarti intinya dia engga merasa kalo dia itu salah. Engga berasa kalo apa yang dia lakukan or said, itu bikin gw naek darah (At this point, gw rasa-rasa pengen gigit-gigit tu orang).

And this phenomena happens ama temen gw juga. Dia ada berantem gede ama cowonya, so as act of truce, cowonya kirim bouqet of flowers to her workplace. Ada kartunya "I'm sorry, I love you". Langsung lumer donk temen gw (cewe mana yang engga bakalan langsung jadi jelly with such a romantic gesture). Eh, pas cowonya ditanya later on ama cewenya, "Do you actually know why i got really angry?", cowonya bengong. tut tut tut. so............. the fight continued.

If you don't even know why we got so upset, then there's a very big chance later on you gonna repeat your mistake dan berantem lagi gara-gara hal yang sama. In that case, mengapa engga take times and energy untuk mengerti or at least engga usa ngerti da why we chicks see it as WRONG, asal tau aza what you did wrong. Jadi engga bakalan ada repetition in the future? YES, YOU, LELAKI, I'M TALKING ABOUT YOU!!
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Dude - Insensitive

Heya fellas,

Mungkin udah terlalu banyak information out there where ada over generalisation, kalo cewe ngomong iya, can be yes can be no. Kalo ngomong engga, can be yes can be no. (Kasian d lo para cowo2, yes I do feel sorry buat cowo yang dapet cewe TERLALU confusing:P).

BUT, not all girls like that, most girls masi sensible being. Sometimes, menurut gw, you dudes need to put the answer into context. Yea, I know... You're dudes are not mind reader (secara cowo gw selalu ngomongnya: "Hunny!! I'm not bloody mind reader!"). It's not like the dudes in chick theory bilang: Cewe2 suka nuntut cowo2 buat baca pikiran nya. But at least body language reader? Face reader? Mood reader? Voice tone reader?

Anyhow, this discussion started.. One day in my lala land. Gw dan lelaki tercinta (Bun) memutuskan untuk jalan-jalan ke Gold Coast via Brisbane. Anyhow, it was around 38°-40°C.

Humid like hell.
Matahari bersinar cerah meriah.
Gosong banget-banget.
Engga ada mobil.
Kudu jalan.
Panas-panas.
Cape.
Lengket.
Laper.

In short, perfect mood banget.. -_-' So, setelah jalan sepanjang hari, come dinner time. Ada restaurant sepanjang jalan kenangan di China Town. Dia tanya gw mo yang mana, gw bilang mana aza. I don't mind.

1st resto
Bun: How about this one?
Me: I dont mind.
Bun: Hm.. ok, let's have a look at other ones

2nd resto
Bun:How about this one?
Me: I dont mind
Bun: Hm... (dan berjalan ke resto berikutnya. Btw, ini resto semuanya samping2an, berderet2, ada kali around 20-30 resto sepanjang jalan dan jual relatively makanan yang sami mawon)

3rd resto
Bun: How about this one?
Me: I..DONT.. MIND!! (setenga teriak dan melotot)
Bun: OK OK! We eat here then! *ngedumel sendiri* (dengan tampang nyolot dan menyebalkan)

Udah dibilang dari pertama, I don't mind.. Just choose. And hurry. Cant you see my state being? Kalo gw engga teriak, mo sampe resto ke berapa baru dia decide? And then you dude say, qta cewe-cewe moody.

Put into context donk guys.. Be sensitive and look for the signs!

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